Thanks to Robert Plant, Turlock, California, for sending this to us
May 28, 2014
This one’s a real gas
May 25, 2014 Leave a Comment
Dear Times,
Now I know why we’re sometimes called “Old Farts.”
I was in a Starbucks Coffee recently when my stomach started rumbling and I realized that I desperately needed to pass some gas.
The place was packed. The music was very loud. To get relief and reduce embarrassment, I timed my farts to the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs I started to feel much better.
I finished my coffee and noticed that everyone was staring at me.
That was when I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my IPod.
Using newfangled technology can be dangerous as we get on.
From an anonymous OF
Webcam 101 for Seniors
May 17, 2014 Leave a Comment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcN08Tg3PWw
Thanks to Robert Plank for informing us about this video
Sex at 75
August 16, 2013 Leave a Comment
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox informing me that I can have sex at 75.
I’m so happy, because I live at number 81. So it’s not too far to walk home afterwards.
And it’s the same side of the street. I don’t even have to cross the road!
“My Favorite Things” by Julie Andrews
May 14, 2013 Leave a Comment
To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan’s Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP.
One of the musical numbers she performed was’My Favorite Things’ from the legendary movie ‘Sound Of Music’.
Here are the lyrics she used:
(Sing It!)
Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so bad.
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin’,
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin’,
And we won’t mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.
When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I’ve had,
And then I don’t feel so bad.
>>>>>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>
(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes, and repeated encores.